Mar 11 2016

Women’s Conditioning

How did all the media and stories of women who have made a difference make you feel this week?

Where you inspired and empowered?

Or where you left feeling inadequate, not good enough?

 

Women have been conditioned since the time we lived in tribes to think that they can never do something right, that they are wrong and that something is wrong with them.

I often notice myself questioning if what is or has happened is my fault, which is much better than before, as I use to presume it was my fault.

Are you aware of a feeling of uneasiness?

Most women admit to themselves that they have this sense. Some women are acutely aware of often feeling super alert and on edge or even paralysed from fear that they are in danger and that something bad can happen at any time. All of these fears have been imprinted in us women since birth and stem from when we lived in tribes. The reason for this is that in the tribes you could be stolen, sold or beaten anytime by a man in your tribe or by another tribe. Therefore you needed to be alert because your life depended on it. The fears and conditioning became so strong because what happened to you was out of your control.

The tricky thing about conditioning is that your unconscious mind will jump in at any time and make decisions for you believing that it is keeping you safe. Because this is so automatic and unconscious you act out these conditioning and fearful behaviours without ever questioning what you are doing. Then you start to believe the conditioning – that you are wrong, that there is something wrong with you, you are not good enough and there are more of these limiting conditioned beliefs.

This is not just for women

Men are effected by conditioning to. I work with couples and it is very insightful and beneficial for them to understand each others conditioning and needs. As they say sometimes it can seem that “women are from venus and men are from mars”.

 

The Good News

I can help you see how this conditioning has got hold of your thoughts and beliefs about yourself. When you work with me we will:

  • Erase the limiting beliefs
  • You will gain a deeper understanding of who you are
  • Connect you more to your higher self and inner wisdom for you to gain more access to your truth and inner resources.
  • How to be your true self – integrating spirt and being a physical body on a physical planet.
  • Moving forward in your life being your true self.

 

You can book now

or email me to arrange a free 20 minute consultation.

Feb 25 2016

How I help you

A Case Study

A lady was drawn to having a session with me but did not know why.  She expressed that she would like some help with clearing her energy and connecting with her higher self, however she did not have an aim or thought that there was something specific that she needed to understand, clear and resolve.  In the free consultation she mentioned that she was often tired and other people had said to her that “she spreads herself to thinly”.  So we agreed that we would explore this in the session and I would read her energy, help her to clear her blocks and learn how to do this herself and connect her with her higher self.

 

Within minutes of being with me this women broke down in tears and she did not understand the strength or reason of her emotion.

In the session she realised that she was often not feeling her emotions and if they arose she was quick to bury them.  She expected herself to be happy all the time and she mostly succeed in giving other people this impression.  However she realised that she would sometimes get angry and thought that she needed to manage her anger; which for her meant that she would tell herself not to be angry and she would bury her emotions.

All of this was because she was holding onto a belief that something was her fault and this felt so bad that she could not allow herself to feel the pain of it.  Holding onto the past and beliefs that we created a long time ago, do not serve us.  This is logical, however often it is so unconscious that we are not even aware that we are doing it.  Or maybe we are aware of it but cannot bear it, so we shut down – like this lady did.  I then help her look at this and feel the pain of it.

You can’t solve emotions with logic, it helps to understand why they are there, but to release the emotion you need to feel it and let it go.  This was much easier and quicker than the lady thought it would be.  You need to feel safe and comfortable to do this and that is what I provide for you.

To complete the session I helped the lady clear and realise the energy that created the blame and belief at the time it was created and everything that she had added to this since.

To summarise what I do in my sessions is help you:

 

  1. Gain a mental and emotional understanding of what is causing your pain, fear and or discomfort.
  2. I then clear the energy of it in the past and in the present.
  3. Help you integrate what you have learnt and let go of so that you are free and energised to create the life you love to live.

Aug 07 2015

I would like to share a really Important lesson I received.

 
I am going to share with you the main thing that I have learned on the two month course called “The Intensive” at ‘The Awakened Life Project’ in Portugal:

 

Let me give you some background – ‘The Awakened Life Project’ is a project and a community that is committed to evolving consciousness. Yes you read that right Evolving Consciousness! Most spiritual and or philosophical teaching only go as far as you becoming aware of your thoughts and feelings and knowing that you create your own suffering. However ALP urges you to go beyond this teaching to a point where you know this so clearly that you live it everyday and you create something new in yourself and the world. In another blog I will write more about this.
 
The Intensive is facilitated by Pete and Cynthia Brampton and based in and supported by the ALP community. On ‘The intensive’ a group of people who do not know each other and have never met before come together to live, learn, develop and co-create with each other. I have always felt a little uncomfortable in groups and especially when I do not have a certain role to play. What was even harder was that we were a a group of 6 women and more or less spent 24/7 with each other. So ‘The Intensive’ was really intense!
 
I learnt a lot and I will share this with you another time. What I learnt the most was this:
 
In meditation one morning the message I received was “let the love out”, it was the mistakable voice of my higher self, so I allowed myself to sit with the fullness of the message.
 
My mind remind me of what I hear a lot of people say about me – that I am kind and generous, some say loving. However, what many people say they first experienced about me is that I am very straight forward and to the point. Often their perception of this is that it is harsh and some say a little aggressive. Which was not at all my intention or how I thought I was being. My intention was to be clear so their would be clarity and ease in the communication.
 
I have felt that people have felt uncomfortable with me. I have also noticed many times that I am some how not able to experience the love I have inside in my relationships with other people. Than at other times I have experienced the love being very present between me and the person I am with.
 
What I have realised on The Intensive was that I was running a mental, psychological program in which I was always protecting myself, being cautious and holding back the true expression of my being as I believed that there was someone who was waiting to attack me or gain something from me. This would at best bring me into doubt and I would feel lost or at worse I would act out of fear and be quiet and distant or aggressive. In another words I was not allowing the love that I feel for people, life and nature to flow freely through me and out of me.
 
It is ironic because to share, receive and give LOVE is all I have ever wanted to do and this has always been a strong intention and value for me. Yet I could not always do this!
 
What I know now is that Love is all there is, Love is Consciousness and Consciousness is Love and you, me, everyone and everything is Love – is Consciousness. This is what we all need to Wake Up to and allow the Love to come in, go through and go out of us. There is no need to hold onto Love (or anything else for that matter) or what or who you perceive gives you Love because YOU ARE LOVE, YOU ARE CONSCIOUSNESS.
 
If I am feeling or acting out of anything that is ‘not’ love than I am acting out of a feeling / sense of a lack of love.
 
Fear is the most extreme lack of love and also the most common.
 
I promise myself that I will go forward in love and that I will trust life to show me where I can give the most love.
If you are ready to be challenged, be uncomfortable and learn about who you really are this is for you.
 
If you want to be free more than anything else than the intensive is for you.
 
I recommend it and Be warned it is intense!
 
See here for more details

Jun 13 2015

Do you every wonder if your OK?

 

Just stop and ponder this question for awhile…

 

There is so much that I am learning here that it is hard to distil ( I am on ‘The Intensive’ a two month course / retreat at The Awakened Life Project).

 

So I thought I would share with you  what is present now.  I am doing a practice where I am not talking, people can interact with me outside of silence time and I can communicate by writing a note. It has been an amazing way for me to clearly hear and see what is going on in my mind.
I was asked if I wanted to do this practice because I was unaware of some of my habits that were caused my me wanting to sense that I am OK and needing to get affirmation from other people.

Does this resonate with you?

 

It has been a hard practice and at the same time fascinating.  What I have realised is that even though I have become very aware of my thoughts, emotions, beliefs I am not always aware of the effect of my habits on other people.  It can be very subtle how my mind and Ego seeks to find out if I am OK.  I was amazed that a thought around this clearly arose within about 20 minutes of this practice.

 

It has been difficult at times and mostly not that easy.  I have noticed that I sometimes feel I need to be part of a conversation, to feel OK; rather than enjoying the flow of the conversation.  An reaction and story around what someone has just said or done can occur so quickly in me, that on at least two occasions I am really glad that I could not voice what I was feeling.

 

However three days into this practice I am finally able to accept this habit in myself and be at ease with it.  I sat in meditation this morning for 2 hours and when it arose I had space around it; this means that I felt at ease with it and I was not taking it personally or making a problem out of it.

 

What can you take from this?

 

Maybe you could allow yourself to notice:

  • Do you wonder if you are OK?
  • Do you what other people to tell you that you are OK?
  • Or that you have done well?
  • If you, like me, do all or any of these notice what happens with your thoughts and emotions and watch your behaviour.  You may find that you would like to change this.

 

How to make changes.

 

Awareness is the key and Acceptance is what opens the door – notice what you are doing, accept it, know that it is not personal, do what you can do to change your behaviour

Seek help / support from other people to help you make the changes you need.

 

Why do I recommend this?

 

Because it is what I am doing.  I am doing this because I want to express my love in the world and help other people do the same.

Contact me here to have a chat or book a session.

Love Fiona

May 04 2015

The ONE thing you NEED to know about Stress.

 

In our modern day pace and hustle of life everyone thinks of stress as a necessary part of their everyday life.

 

But is this the truth?

 

Stress gets a lot of bad publicity and yet most people only understand what they mean by stress and do not actually know what stress is.

 

The definition of stress in relation to people is in simple terms:

“A person’s ability to cope with the demands placed upon them”.

 

This means that people naturally have different thresholds to what they find stressful and different perceptions of their ability to cope with stress.  Which makes a lot of sense as people are different and what I like to do can be different to what you like to do.

 

What I specially want to point out here is that stress has everything to do with a person’s perception – that is how they see themselves, how they see the world and how they see their place in the world (where they fit in).  This is reflected in the second part of the definition ‘the demands placed upon them’.

 

Lets break this up into parts:

  1. ‘the demands’ – a demand can be something that you perceive as a neutral request / instruction or it can be seen as a massive pressure that infringes your human rights, and anything and everything in-between.
  2. ‘placed upon them’ – a lot of stress, in my opinion, is caused through the person believing that they have no control and that their control has been taken away from them.

 

I done my thesis, for my BSc in Psychology, on “Perceived Control and Children’s Engagement in School”.  What I expected to find was that the reason why children went to school and worked hard was because they believed that it was important to their parents and that they wanted to please they parents – this is called an external reason / belief in Psychology.  What I actually found was that the main reason was the child wanted to learn and do well in school – this is called an internal reason / belief in Psychology.

 

This is important because it shows that when the child does something for their own reasons, rather than to please someone else, their perception of how much control they have increases and this in turn increases their engagement and therefore increase their success in school.

 

The ONE thing you need to know about STRESS is:

You cause the stress in your life.

 

You do this by:

  1. Not making choices about what you want to do and how you want to do it – taking Autonomy.
  2. Not taking responsibility for your actions
  3. Playing the role of victim, rather than owning responsibility for what YOU may perceive as ‘needing to be done BY YOU’ and doing it in a light hearted joyful manner.

 

Just ONE more thing ;-):

When you are the most stressed you will often not fully appreciate how much it is effecting you, you may even not realise that you are stressed (which is the case for MOST people).

 

Stayed tuned for my next blog post about how this recently happened to me.

 

ps: By the time you get this I will be on my two month retreat in Portugal as part of the Awakened Life Project.

Apr 23 2015

e-course in ‘The Key to Awareness’ process

This e-course is coming soon…

 

 

Apr 14 2015

Jumping into the Unknown

I have been on a two year journey of hip and back pain that stopped me in my tracks so I could take a deeper look at myself and my life.

 

I was guided to a Project called The Awakened Life Project (ALP) and they guided me to a community called Avidanja.  Some of you may know that I spent the month of March at this community.  The main aim of this community and ALP is to be Free of all conditioning and to Evolve your Consciousness beyond awareness / enlightenment.  So when you life there and you start to go into story or conditioning or ego this is pointed out to you.  Believe me this is not always easy.  At times it was frustrating, at the least, to activating the monster inside me; which at this point can bring up the monster in everyone around you.

 

I was surprised at how strongly a particular part of my conditioning was activated.  My physical body was triggered back in time to some very old pain and I physically felt like I was back there reliving it.  I am grateful that I had the awareness to know this was what was happening however I could not pull myself out of the physical emotions and chemicals that were pulsing high speed through my body.  For three days I would temporally be pulled back into this and I admit that it was scary at times.

 

For the next three weeks the emotions and conditioning was in the background of my mind and body and it took a lot of awareness and acceptance not to be triggered back into the conditioning.

 

In another words I realised that I need to be in unfamiliar territory for the powerful unknown to create the environment where anything can happen and I can get triggered!

 

(I am an aware person however, living in a nice home, surrounded by friends life is to easy and too comfortable for the deep Sh!t to arise.  And it is from the muck that the lotus flower blossoms.)

 

So I have made the decision to jump of the edge of the cliff into the unknown.

 

Have you read this metaphor for awakening before?  I have and I always admired the poetry of the words, however until this moment I have to confuse that I had no idea what it really meant.

 

My jumping of the edge of the cliff into the unknown is going to ALP to be on a two month Intensive Retreat, where the main purpose is for all that is not awake in me to be pointed out to me so that I will hopefully let go of my conditioning and atop identifying with my conditioning.  However this is just the start because I can then start to Evolve my Consciousness.

 

Exciting? Nerve Racking? Madness?

 

Yep, it feels like all three but I am signed up and the flight is booked!

 

Yes the flight is booked, just one, because I realised that if I am going to experience the full power of the unknown I need to totally jump without any safety net.  So to this end I am giving the keys back to my landlord and storing what I own in my parents loft.  I have also told my physical therapy clients that I am closing the clinic (this has been the hardest thing I have done, so far).  The only thing that I am allowing myself to keep is my Awakening and Freeing yourself from Emotions and Trauma business, because I love you guys so much.  And at the moment this feels like how I can most help people to create the life they want to live and be free.

Book now to set yourself free, email or call me.

 

During the months of May and June You can buy my book and other items of my website – I am hoping to put together a new e-course for The Key to Awareness” – stay tuned, and book yourself in for a session after June.  But in May and June I will not personally be available to take inquires or do one to one sessions with anyone.

 

Send me an email or call me to book now.

Mar 30 2015

Easter Gifts

Special Offer

1st One to One Session with voucher ONLY £60, value £85.

 


Happy Easter Coaching example

If you would like more information about the one to one sessions click here

Conditions of Voucher:

  • The session is over the phone or via Skype.
  • Session time and date must be agreed with me before the 30/4/2015.
  • No refunds are given.

 

Massage Gift Voucher £40, value £50



EasterMassageExample

 If you would like more information about the massages click here

Conditions of Voucher:

  • The voucher can only be used in April 2015 up to the 29/4/15.
  • My clinic is in Luton – Beds, and the person must come to the clinic.

Feb 09 2015

Do you long for a Deeper Connection?

  • Do you live in your head?

  • Do you spend lots of time analysing or replaying things?

  • Is it important to you that you are right?

 

If you do feel like this you are not alone and I have good news of you.

 

The truth is our society is designed to teach you to be logical, academically intelligent, to communicate with the external world and to judge someones’ language as a sign of who and what they are i.e. intelligent / rich or stupid / poor.

 

So to be seen as successful you have developed your intelligence, your ability to analyse and also your ability to judge and criticise others.

 

When this happens life often feels like a struggle and is stressful;

You lose your ability to connect with who You are, empathise with others and to establish and maintain meaningful relationships.

 

Do you long to have a deeper connection with people? –

Maybe even a deeper connection with yourself?

If you are relating to any of the questions above there is an answer for you.

 

Download my free audio series and

begin connecting with the Real You –

By signing in to the box on the right of this page.

Jan 27 2015

Realising Your Dreams

What have you said to yourself your whole life?

 

For as long as I can remember I have said to myself

“There must be more to Life than this!”

 

What I saw most people doing was their parent(s) would work as much as they could, to provide as much as they could to enjoy life… very little.

It wasn’t that my family or the families around me, when I was growing up, were miserable it was just that they were too tired to enjoy life. The weekends were spent at church, shopping and fixing the car (my family was lucky enough to have a car).

 

I remember thinking

“Im not going to do this, Im going to enjoy my life”.

 

For most of my life I have lived in a different way to most people and it has been very exciting at times and at times it has been difficult or just plain Hard! But the question has always been there:

“How can I create a life that is different from this?”.

 

To maybe get an answer to this question I am going to Portugal in March to visit a Sustainable Spiritual Community to see how they live a life that is based on:

  • helping and supporting each other to reach and live their Full Potential,
    to live with the earth sustainably
    to grow they own food
    to help the wider community enjoy their life
    Live in Harmony and Peace

I will let you know what I find out.

 

What about You?

What question burns in your heart and mind?

What entered your mind just then write it down and send it to me.

 

You have to ask the question to realise what your dreams are.

Happy Realising 🙂

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