I have been on a two year journey of hip and back pain that stopped me in my tracks so I could take a deeper look at myself and my life.
I was guided to a Project called The Awakened Life Project (ALP) and they guided me to a community called Avidanja. Some of you may know that I spent the month of March at this community. The main aim of this community and ALP is to be Free of all conditioning and to Evolve your Consciousness beyond awareness / enlightenment. So when you life there and you start to go into story or conditioning or ego this is pointed out to you. Believe me this is not always easy. At times it was frustrating, at the least, to activating the monster inside me; which at this point can bring up the monster in everyone around you.
I was surprised at how strongly a particular part of my conditioning was activated. My physical body was triggered back in time to some very old pain and I physically felt like I was back there reliving it. I am grateful that I had the awareness to know this was what was happening however I could not pull myself out of the physical emotions and chemicals that were pulsing high speed through my body. For three days I would temporally be pulled back into this and I admit that it was scary at times.
For the next three weeks the emotions and conditioning was in the background of my mind and body and it took a lot of awareness and acceptance not to be triggered back into the conditioning.
In another words I realised that I need to be in unfamiliar territory for the powerful unknown to create the environment where anything can happen and I can get triggered!
(I am an aware person however, living in a nice home, surrounded by friends life is to easy and too comfortable for the deep Sh!t to arise. And it is from the muck that the lotus flower blossoms.)
So I have made the decision to jump of the edge of the cliff into the unknown.
Have you read this metaphor for awakening before? I have and I always admired the poetry of the words, however until this moment I have to confuse that I had no idea what it really meant.
My jumping of the edge of the cliff into the unknown is going to ALP to be on a two month Intensive Retreat, where the main purpose is for all that is not awake in me to be pointed out to me so that I will hopefully let go of my conditioning and atop identifying with my conditioning. However this is just the start because I can then start to Evolve my Consciousness.
Exciting? Nerve Racking? Madness?
Yep, it feels like all three but I am signed up and the flight is booked!
Yes the flight is booked, just one, because I realised that if I am going to experience the full power of the unknown I need to totally jump without any safety net. So to this end I am giving the keys back to my landlord and storing what I own in my parents loft. I have also told my physical therapy clients that I am closing the clinic (this has been the hardest thing I have done, so far). The only thing that I am allowing myself to keep is my Awakening and Freeing yourself from Emotions and Trauma business, because I love you guys so much. And at the moment this feels like how I can most help people to create the life they want to live and be free.
During the months of May and June You can buy my book and other items of my website – I am hoping to put together a new e-course for The Key to Awareness” – stay tuned, and book yourself in for a session after June. But in May and June I will not personally be available to take inquires or do one to one sessions with anyone.